One of my favorite lines from a movies every!!! "Sometimes, being a Bitch is all a woman has to hold on to!" Wow does that say it all or what? I know that's how I've been feeling lately. The movie was Dolores Claiborne (1995), written by Stephen King, and starring Kathy Bates, Jennifer Jason Leigh and Christopher Plummer. The movies actual tag line is: "Sometimes an accident can be an unhappy woman's best friend." I like my favorite quote better.
warning: rather long rant to follow
I wrote all of that to say, again, my parents are in town. And believe me, I love my family. But sometimes I feel like my family thinks because I'm single, not dating anyone at the moment, and have no children, that any free moment I have should be dedicated to them. Don't think for a moment that any of the following rant means I don't love spending time with my family, I just wish I could be allowed to have a life free of family obligations. Just for a few moments at a time. Every time I turn around, and have a day or two free, it feels like there they are. Sometimes I think or feel like they think I have no life without them. Granted, I don't have much life without them, but I do have some. And could probably have more if I hadn't always been made to feel so stunted. And now, after almost 39 yrs, I've finally stood up for myself with her and asked not to be imposed upon (automatically they assume it's alright). I'm being made to feel like a selfish and ungrateful child. Maybe I'm wrong, but that's how she makes me feel. I don't want them to think I don't want them here, it's just when they're here MY life comes to a screeching halt. At every turn, every decision is questioned, every choice criticized, every failure illuminated, every negative thought about me voiced. It's hard to WANT to deal with that.
Sorry about the rant! I just needed to get it off my chest. No more negative thoughts. I promise. And a more positive post later.